Catboy SPEAKS!

With no internet to educate them on proper technique, they repeatedly engaged in the world’s least satisfying 69. (via ducodubo)

With all due respect.

via large penis party

Our society will never progress if we can’t even master the art of measuring cocks. Without a solid baseline how are we supposed to tell if our hormone emulsified drinking water is increasing wang size? Amphibians have a much easier tell: they respond by become hermaphrodites.

But I admit, I’m part of the problem. I cheat by quoting my size in obscure units. Did you know my cock’s 1.7×10⁹ angstroms long?

Too inky (via show your dick)

Too dinky (via measure your cock)

Too piggy (via large penis party)

Too WTF? Is that a strangly long thin wiener that pinches in the middle then dog-legs to the left? Or did someone fail at Photoshop? (via large penis party)

“Oh jeepers! That sure is a big ding-a-ling in my patootie!”

via innocent look

No comment necessary.

via no panties allowed

I suspect alcohol was involved. I can only hope the law was too because I would love to read this police report.

…you know, the one with the big hooters?

via come girls

“Puckered” (via just for fun)

“Haute couture” (via just for fun)

via fum on her case

via seriously, i can haz boobs?

I applaud Korbel’s new viral marketing campaign; Milk has been doing it for years (example).

via 8=D

via stuff my cock likes…

I want to hear the story from the point of view of the guy on the boat: “And then her hand just fucking disappeared! It was crazy!”